Friday, September 28, 2012

Lost Delusions

I never tried to be the one to upstage another man
So for you to say that I am jealous
Is like saying that I am reckless
Just because he can sing like a crooner
Or has a better car than I to take you out for dinner
Has no bearing on how I feel in comparison to him
Despite your incompetence
You take the instance of me looking at you
To deceive yourself in believing I want to talk to you
And decide to declare that you have a man
Which speaks volumes about you
And only embarrasses him
Since without saying a single word
You thought I was plotting how to make a move
That means you are conceited
Thinking more of yourself than you actually are
And since like draws like
He must be unrealistic within himself
Proud to have what he has to try and say he is a man
Than be what he should be and stand as one
Instead of a man
He is a portfolio
And instead of a relationship
You are a modeling agency
You are the top model
Of ignorance
Showing your true colors behind shaded eyeliner
No real man has reason to be jealous of vanity
Envious of a man who spends more time in a mirror
Than his own reflection
Trying to validate his manhood by saying you're "his girl"
Only shows you are delusional
Because in emphasizing that you are "his girl"
Shows that just like everyone else
You are aware
Of his tendencies
But would rather fight for what he gives away
Than leave to spare your emotions being slayed

Monday, September 24, 2012

Morning After Coffee

Sitting on the edge of the bed
Watching the sun rise over the horizon
Listening to the birds outside
Feeling hands touch my back
Thinking about the night I had
Realizing I need to stop drinking
Last night's beauty
Is this morning's beast

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Blood On Her Pillow

I need to sit down with you
We have an issue
Sit back and relax
Here's some tissue
There is something I need you to hear
Be clear
This thing that you'll hear
Stays right here

I have a friend
Who was troubled
She lived in a bubble
She was hurt
She was lost
And she died in her rubble
When I found her
I had found her too late
She was gone
She had left from her physical state

On her bed
I sat down
I put my head down
I was stuck
So confused
What could I do now?
I heard something
Crinkle under my feet
I looked down
And I found this long sheet

And it said...

"So many years I was abused
I felt so misused
I would cry
When I heard his hard shoes
Lay in bed sobbing tears
In my bed with my fears
See his shadow in the door
And I smelled his beers

I would call out to you
But you wouldn't hear me
I would tell you he's bad
You wouldn't come near me
When I tried to show you
What he had did
You would slap me
And say I was a horrible kid

But you didn't do it physically
You did it mentally
So I lived in a cell
Conscious penitentiary
You always were so blind to the game
That you never saw
He put me through pain
And that stayed with me

I grew up and did worse
Every man I got worse
No matter how much I prayed
I felt like a curse
So what more can I do?
There's not more I can lose
My mind and my body
Can't sing no more blues"

What do you think mom?
Isn't this a sad letter?
And the more that I read
The more things ain't get better
Just listen to this part
To what she said next
I was madder than I ever been before
And my soul became vexed

"Only one who tried helping me
I loved like no other
But I can't be with him
He's my brother
And that's just sick
But he loves me
And does all that he can
Even comes over
To be my strong hand
Lord please bless him

No one else
No one else I can say
Was someone who was there in my life
Who cared in that way
So I laid down
With every man I met
Even some women
For a love I never knew how to get

So big brother
When you find this note
Don't feel bad
But still love you
And when you find a way
To go and tell mom
Don't get mad
That she would know the truth"

So I ask you now
How do you feel
And mom
I want to know right now
Just how real
Because mom
That man that did this was a robber
Your husband
The girl he stole innocence from
Was your daughter!

But you knew this, didn't you?

Saturday, September 8, 2012

Wanted: Change

Don't tell me about what the next man is not doing
Don't bury me with the usual propaganda
Don't try to underlie the other man to appease my preconceived notions
The tides are shifting
Where once there was safety and tranquility
There is now sacrifice and tribulation
The security that once was placed in savings and stocks
Has become endangered by credit and bonds
What do you do then?
When what was once the building block of business loses value
And the integrity of corporations is forsaken for profit
The people work all day
To come short when bills are due
The prophecies are to be fulfilled
But who said they have to be now?